This is Not a Diet

Why I Eat Pasta

22 02 2013

Pasta!

I know, I know… in the universe of diets and healthy eating, I may as well declare I inject myself with radioactive waste. Pasta! Carbs! Wheat! Gluten! Refined Grains! The Horror….

Yet, here I am. I eat pasta. I successfully lost weight. I successfully maintain it. I live!

How can this be?

Let me first state that I am fully aware there are people who have different dietary needs than I do myself. I know there are people with conditions that mean they cannot eat the things I eat. That is 100% No Problem. I am totally behind whatever makes you happy and healthiest.

However, I personally do not have any health reasons to avoid gluten. Side note: It is disturbing how many times I have made this statement only to have someone tell me I am mistaken. Oh really? You know my body better than I do? My experience is invalid? That does not sit well with me. Remember that part about me supporting you in whatever makes you happy and healthy? It should be a two-way street. I feel great, I sleep great, I wake up with energy, I don’t have any digestive issues, all my test numbers are perfect, and I’m happy. I am gluten tolerant. Enough said.

And yes. I have read what you have read, so you don’t have to share “Wheat Belly” or “Good Calories, Bad Calories” with me. Yes, I know that grains are what are killing us all since Paleolithic times. Yes, I know today’s wheat is not the same as the wheat of yesteryear. Yes I know about the GMOs. Yes, I know about insulin resistance and the glycemic index. Yes, I know. Oh, do I ever know. I have read far more than my fair share of health and nutrition articles and books.

In the end, I had to take it all with a grain of salt. Literally. I like salt.

If I stopped eating everything I have read people should not eat, I would just starve to death because there would be nothing left to eat. I have taken what I learned when I was still reading that stuff, and used what makes sense to me and ignored the rest. I don’t read it anymore because I got sick of the hyperbole. You know what’s going to kill us all eventually? Life. But you have to eat to live, so just do the best you can and ignore the rest.

There are things I personally do not eat. I do not eat meat. I do not eat High Fructose Corn Syrup. I do not eat Hydrogenated or Partially-Hydrogenated oils. I do not drink soda. I do not eat fast food. I do not eat Cool Ranch Doritos or Lean Cuisine. I do my very best to eat food. I read ingredient lists and make sure they are short and comprehensible. I cook almost everything I eat from scratch.

And that’s enough for me. You could stop short of where I am or you could go further. Or you could go in a totally different direction. Just look at the wide world of international cuisine. Different cultures have completely varied and distinct food traditions yet none of them have health issues we have in the US. Pasta has been a part of some of those cultures’ diets for centuries.

Here are my top reasons for including pasta in my diet 1-2 times per week:

It is delicious. Pasta has always been one of my favorite foods. It’s right up there with artichokes, ripe tomatoes, and dark chocolate.
It is easy. Boil water. Throw in pasta. Wait about 10 min. Drain. While it’s cooking, I can chop up some vegetables. Simple, quick, hot dinner.
It is filling. I find pasta very satisfying. Especially mixed with some tasty veggies, it’s a meal I always enjoy that keeps me satiated.
It is easy to control the portion. Many people have a difficult time not over-eating pasta. I can relate. It’s an easy thing to eat more of, going back to that “delicious” thing. There’s a really simple solution for this though: only cook the amount you intend to eat.
As a vegetarian, it gives me options when eating out. Often the only non-meat dish on a menu is some sort of pasta.

Next, I’d like to talk about they type of pasta I choose to eat most often: plain old regular pasta. The kind people ate before they started worrying about gluten or even whole grains. The kind I grew up eating. I have tried all the other types, and some of them are okay, but when it comes right down to it, I just like regular pasta better. I figured out awhile ago that for me, it’s better to just have the real thing I want in a moderate portion than to have a substitute that doesn’t quite satisfy.

I’d also like to go back to my ingredient list reading. This pasta is pretty ideal to me. It’s organic. It has one ingredient. I’ve noticed that most whole grain pastas have lots of ingredients. Some of them are weird. I don’t bother researching weird ingredients anymore, I just don’t buy it. If I find a whole grain pasta with a short ingredient list, I try it. It’s usually okay, but not as good as something like this.

pasta brands

Of course, fresh or homemade pasta would be even better! But pasta is one of those staples I just like to have around for when I forget to shop or don’t know what to make. It’s a staple in my cabinet. I don’t let perfect be an enemy of good.

There are other noodles I am fond of. Buckwheat noodles are quite good and I like to have them with Asian type dishes. I tried some quinoa pasta I liked quite a bit. Rice noodles are good.

But nothing is ever going to replace pasta in my kitchen. It’s just one of my favorite foods.

Including your favorite foods in your diet is important. I believe in eating a healthy variety and not stressing about it too much. For healthy, active adults, it doesn’t need to be much more complicated that.

Comments : 15 Comments »
Tags: carbs, cooking, diet, gluten tolerant, Health, healthy cooking, healthy pasta, pasta, vegetarian, weight loss
Categories : Cooking

Getting My Exercise Groove Back

27 01 2013

I’ve been struggling with my motivation and enjoyment of exercise for awhile now. I started out 4 years ago hating it and learned to love it. But last year I started having back issues and then I fell and got that concussion and I haven’t felt thrilled about exercising for awhile. Being in pain makes it lame. I can’t do the things I was doing before so easily and constantly worry that whatever I do or don’t do will make it worse. Then the whole concussion thing just slowed me down even more.

Oh, I’ve been exercising, don’t get me wrong. I’ve been dragging myself to the gym and doing the damn thing.

In a way, I feel like exercise and I are an old married couple who need to get our spark back. We need some new toys or new setting… maybe some role-playing? Yeah, getting your heart rate up is pretty good and helps with stress whether it’s all that thrilling or not, but this thing used to be hot and steamy and fun! I need to get back to that. We’re too young to give up on passion, exercise! Stella needs to get her groove back.

Some things are off the table right now and I’ve decided to accept this and get over it. I will not be running or lifting heavy weights anytime in the near future. However, I’m also tired of worrying about the whole back pain thing. I’ve been chasing my tail on that and not getting anywhere. If nothing I do seems to make any difference, why not just do what I want? So that’s what I’m doing.

I quit my gym and joined a different one. One that has BodyPump. When I really think about what I have enjoyed most in terms of exercise, BodyPump always rises to the top of the list. I wasn’t sure if it was a great idea or not as far as the whole back pain thing goes, but I went back to my first class in over a year 3 weeks ago. Oh, I was sore for days afterward. But I went back the next week and it was much better. I’m hoping to work back up to 2-3 days a week. This was the most exciting exercise I’d done for a long time.

Come to think of it, I just don’t really like regular weight lifting. It’s boring. I hate resting between sets. I hate counting. It’s repetitive. I know, I know, it’s all the rage, but you know what, if I don’t enjoy it, I won’t keep doing it. So maybe this back pain thing is a blessing in disguise in some way, it’s reminding me to be true to myself. That’s about as positive as I can get about the whole thing.

Next, I realized, I’m kind of sick of being in a gym. Sure, I still manage to get some enjoyment out of the music on my headphones while slogging it out on the elliptical or stair climber. And thankfully, my new gym has a ton more cardio equipment than my old one, so there’s more variety. But the reality is, I want to be outside! And I live in California where the weather is almost always tolerable, unless it’s pouring rain, so what’s stopping me?

Last week, instead of the gym a few nights, I went for walks. I walked around my neighborhood which is beautiful and peaceful. I live close enough to a hilly area where I can get some up and down hills for variety. So, I’m not jogging anymore, but that’s okay. I enjoy walking and I feel like it does my mind good to be outside. It’s beautiful out there. It smells good.

a sunny afternoon walk

an overcast evening

park across from work

On Friday, instead of hitting the gym, I stopped at a park across the street from my work and hiked around it. I enjoyed these walks and hikes much more than I’ve enjoyed the gym for ages. It feels good to breathe the air instead of being inside with all the sweaty people.

Then on Saturday morning, I found my new yoga studio. Why do I wait so long to do these things? Yoga is the other physical activity that always comes up when I think about what I really enjoy. I can’t wait to really get back into my yoga practice. I have a ton of old posts about yoga on my blog if you’d like to read some of my thoughts about it. Hint: I’m a big fan.

So there it is. In less than one month, Exercise and I have completely renewed and reinvented our relationship. Instead of drudging along doing exercise I wasn’t really enjoying anymore, I have three new activities to explore: my new gym and BodyPump, Hiking, and Yoga. I feel excited to exercise again! I’m imagining getting up and having a nice long walk before work or an early yoga class, Saturday mornings on my yoga mat followed by brunch and coffee at the outdoor cafe and the farmers market when it starts back up, finding new places in my area to walk and hike (so many!), trying new group classes at the gym, and so much more!

As always, you have to keep changing and adapting to make things work for you. What was great yesterday may lose its appeal over time. This is okay! We can decide to try different things. You don’t have to keep doing the same thing over and over again if you’re tired of it. There are so many options, find the ones that appeal to who you are today.

Comments : 16 Comments »
Tags: bodypump, elliptical, exercise, hiking, jogging, outdoors, walking, yoga
Categories : exercise

Book: Health at Every Size by Linda Bacon

20 01 2013

Before I review the book, let me tell you what “Health at Every Size” means to me in the context of my own lifestyle journey. I think this phrase, “Health at Every Size” (HAES) can bring up some very conflicting feelings for people. Some people hear this and think it’s an “excuse to be fat,” since, you know, we’re all looking for one of those since it’s so fun to be fat in our society. This is not what it means. To me it means focusing on health instead of size. It does not mean laying down on the couch and eating Cheetos until you’re 800 pounds. That is not health. But it also means that if you are 800 pounds, there’s more benefit to be found in choosing to focus on living a healthier lifestyle than to focus on weight. Focusing on that lifestyle may very well lead to weight loss for some people, but it will lead to better health even if you are thin or already happy at whatever size you are.

It may seem odd for someone whose claim to fame was losing over 100 pounds to be espousing these ideas, but I found my lifestyle journey did not end when I finished losing weight. I didn’t want to fall into the trap I saw so many other successful weight-losers falling into, the trap of a miserable relationship with food and weight. The book I am about to review spoke to me very deeply at a time where I have recently changed my own outlook on the whole journey by shifting it away from weight. This passage, among many others, spoke to me directly:

“While lifestyle change is valuable, it is rarely maintained when driven by weight loss goals. Tricks to minimize hunger may result in short term success but are ultimately challenged by long term weight regulation mechanisms. And while certain habits may result in weight loss for some individuals, there are no guarantees. Failed attempts at losing weight make people feel like failures and even those who succeed feel a never-ending pressure to retain that success that will always limit their ability to feel comfortable around food and in their bodies. By putting an emphasis on weight, we also limit our ability to support thin people in adopting healthy behaviors.”

I see this so much when I venture onto weight maintenance boards. So much self-dissatisfaction, fear, and anxiety surrounding the possibility of weight regain. I didn’t want to be like that. I want to live my life in a healthy manner, but also feel comfortable with myself and allow myself the flexibility to settle into my own comfort zone. I’m not planning to spend my life at war with my body.

HAES doesn’t mean that everyone is healthy at the weight they are. I wasn’t. I was almost 300 pounds for some very simple lifestyle-choice related reasons. My weight loss journey showed me where I erred. Perhaps I could have approached this from a less weight-driven perspective if I had any inkling such a movement existed. But I did not find out about HAES until long after I had lost 120 pounds. I now believe that much of the reason I gained so much weight over my natural body size was because of my history of dieting. I would like to help others skip this fate of yo-yo dieting your way up heavier and heavier. I think this book can help people understand why maybe dieting isn’t the answer the way we are led to believe it is.

Me at my heaviest, thinnest, and happiest (currently).

I started out wanting to lose weight. I lost weight. I have since gained back a portion of the weight I lost. I’ve been a lot heavier than I am now and I’ve been a little thinner. I prefer myself as I am today, hips and all. I don’t weigh myself anymore and don’t plan to any time soon. I trust myself that my body will be the “right” size for me as long as I make the choices that are healthy for my life. I may not be the right size for you or society or the BMI chart, but that’s okay, I only aim to satisfy myself.

I’m not sure whether I could consider myself part of the HAES movement or not. I’ve ventured onto some forums and lurked around a little and I’m not sure people would be supportive of me as a person who feels my weight loss journey was valuable and who did have weight-related goals I met and have maintained for the most part. I understand the reason such things are looked upon with derision by the fat-acceptance movement. I’m not sure I belong there. I’m just me, I guess. I have a unique story and viewpoint. And I have my own community, so it’s all good.

Whether you feel like you want to be a part of this movement or not, the book is great and will help you to look at things in a new light. It will challenge your preconceived notions about weight and health.

(Click to view book on Amazon.com)

“The science of weight regulation directly contradicts cultural assumptions as well as those promoted by the ‘experts.’”

Weight and health are not as tied together as we are led to believe, according to Linda Bacon. In Health at Every Size, she makes a compelling case that the “obesity crisis” is a manufactured fear that misplaces our concern for health problems by focusing it solely on body size. She points to several studies and scientific findings that support this claim.

Next, she shows why dieting doesn’t work to reduce and maintain weight in the long run. As we are all aware, the long term success rates for all diet plans are dismal. This doesn’t mean there aren’t people who do successfully lose and maintain the lower weight, it just means they are very rare. A history of dieting is one of the greatest predictors of obesity, ironically. Yet we continue to place our hopes and dreams in the diet basket. Here are some of the concerning effects of dieting:

“Dieting:

Slows the rate at which your body burns calories.
Increases your body’s efficiency at wringing every possible calorie out of the food you do eat so you digest food faster and get hungrier quicker.
Causes you to crave high-fat foods.
Increases your appetite.
Reduces your energy levels (so even if you could burn more calories through physical activities, you don’t want to.)
Lowers your body temperature so you’re using less energy (and are always cold.)
Reduces your ability to feel “hungry” and “full,” making it easier to confuse hunger with emotional needs.
Reduces your total amount of muscle tissue (and you may know that a pound of muscle burns more calories than a pound of fat.)
Increases fat-storage enzymes and decreases fat-release enzymes.”

I think most of us who have dieted can relate to several of the items on this list. I know I can.

Next, she talks about some of the outside forces that over-ride our natural hunger and fullness signals and may lead to the accumulation of excess weight:

“By creating a system that maintains a cheap and plentiful supply of corn and soybeans, among other products, government policy has inadvertently favored the production of foods that promote weight gain and damage health.”

“Food companies have a vested interest in getting us to ignore our body signals. Thea more we eat the more product they sell, and the more money they can make. If we stop eating when we are full, it is bad for business!”

“If you think I’m angry that the corporations and government agencies have co-opted the production and distribution of food at the expense and well-being, you’re right. I value the sensation of hunger as a sign of the body’s wisdom, not as a commercial asset to be manipulated for market share. I value food as nourishment, not as a unit of sales. I value our bodies as gifts of life, not as product-consumption devices.”

I love that last bit. I’m angry too! Let’s all get angry and do something about this!

That is what I liked most about this book. It reinforces the conclusions I came to myself through my own experience and points to some research and studies to back them up, always helpful when trying to make a point that goes against what most people believe about health and weight.

“Many people are concerned that if they accept their bodies they may become complacent and remain “stuck” forever with a body they’ve grown to loathe. They believe that hating their body is an essential motivation for change so they resist letting go of that self-hatred.”

That is one of the most difficult barriers to body love, the fear that hate is the only impetus to change. I, and many others, have found that the exact opposite is true. Hate is a very poor motivator in the long run. Love and respect are boundless. Accepting your body doesn’t preclude living a healthy lifestyle; it enhances your chances to stick with it long term.

The concluding message of the book is pretty much exactly what I’ve been saying for years. I think most people could find something of benefit to them in this book, and for some people it could be life changing. This is the last health/eating/weight book I plan to read any time in the near future. I do trust myself. It’s the best feeling in the world.

“Free yourself from the limiting cultural biases around eating and weight and challenge them in others. Let go of the rules, the judgments, the “expert” advice. Trust that you know best how to take care of yourself. Respect your hunger and appetite, and let them guide you to better health and fulfillment. Expand that openness to others and celebrate the diversity that makes us human.”

Comments : 9 Comments »
Tags: book reivew, diet, HAES, Health, health at every size, lifestyle, Weight, weight loss
Categories : Book

Health and Weight

13 01 2013

People like easy answers. We prefer things to be black or white, right or wrong, and good or bad. It either is or it isn’t. We also like to extrapolate that because we had a certain experience, others must have had the same experience. When someone has a contradictory experience, sometimes we find it threatening when in reality, it needn’t be. My experience does not invalidate yours, even if they are polar opposites.

I consider myself to have complex views on weight and health that are not easily condensed into short phrases. Sometimes, this makes it rather difficult to write for my Facebook page because I cannot say everything in every status. Twitter is off the table for me. I need a lot more letters to say most things I care to say. My views are very nuanced, not the same as what they were last year, and constantly evolving.

This blog recently passed its third year of existence, so it seems like a good time to write this down in words instead of just keeping it in my head.

Health and Weight are Not the Same Thing

This is at the very core of what I believe about our society’s health issues related to lifestyle. Because we put the focus so keenly upon weight, i.e. the “obesity epidemic,” we are missing the point. There is something amiss with the foods we eat and our sedentary lifestyles but it is much more complex than simply battling weight gain. When you tell someone they are too fat and they should lose weight, generally, they go on a diet. This does not usually mean anything positive; a temporary restrictive plan, weight lost, and quickly regained. Rather than approaching the root issues, this focus treats one symptom. To top it off, it’s a symptom that is not easily overcome. In fact, we know very clearly that the usual methods people use to reduce their weight generally lead to gain not loss in the long run.

By focusing so much on weight, I believe we do everyone a disservice, large and small. Thin people may feel complacent about their lifestyle choices since they are thin while heavy people who are in good health may feel compelled to try weight loss methods that actually harm them.

I believe that everyone can benefit from shifting our focus to the causes, not the symptoms.

Our Perception of Weight is Skewed

There is a difference between being 10 pounds “overweight” and being 300 pounds overweight. If you happen to be 20 pounds overweight according to the out-dated and arbitrary categories of the BMI chart, you may in fact be at a very healthy and natural weight for your particular body. If you are carrying so much excess weight it makes it difficult to go about your daily activities, that is an entirely different situation. Yet when we speak about weight, there’s generally no distinction made between these two scenarios or any of the many variations between them. It almost seems as though every single person I meet wants to, thinks about, talks about, or is trying to lose weight – regardless of their size.

I am positive that from a health perspective, there is genuinely no reason for many of these people to lose weight at all except for the expectation put forth that we ought all look a certain way. If people want to lose weight to look a certain way, it’s their life and I do not begrudge them that. But let’s call this what it is and not pretend our desire to see our abs or ribs, whichever your preference be, has anything at all to do with health.

Healthy Habits Can Benefit Everyone

No matter what you look like, I firmly believe your life can benefit from consuming nutritious food in quantities appropriate to your activity level and from leading a more active life. It just seems to me that if we celebrated actions like learning to cook our own food again, concentrating on real foods with nutritious value, and regular exercise or physical activity, people would know what to do. Instead, we say “Lose Weight” and people are really confused about how to do that. If it were so easy, wouldn’t everyone have done it by now? Clearly this line of advising does not work very well for people.

Our Health Problem is Bigger than Personal Responsibility

It’s easy to point fingers and blame each other for poor choices, but the truth of the matter is, it is the social norm to eat a lot of processed nutrition-less junk, to not cook your own dinner, to eat in the car, to drink sugary beverages, to sit at a desk all day and to watch a lot of TV. Expecting all of society to miraculously become rebels against what we have been taught is normal is expecting the impossible. On an individual level, we can absolutely each change our own lifestyle. If we want to tackle this problem on a social level, we need social and political change. Some of the causes of the lifestyle epidemic aside from personal choices are:

- Food manufacturers want to make a profit. It is not in their interest for people to eat less. Food products are designed to encourage you to eat more of them, from the way they are packaged to the way they taste and smell to the way they are advertised.

- The diet industry wants to make a profit. It is not in their interest for you to lose weight and keep it off. Dieting, in the long run, causes weight gain and the maintenance rate for weight loss is dismal.

- The medical community is behind the times on the science of weight and weight loss. It’s a big business. Surgeries, procedures and medications are a big money maker for pharmaceutical companies, but again they treat the symptom not the underlying issues. We need a complete shift from treatment after the fact to prevention. As consumers, we also need a shift of expectation from thinking there’s a pill that can “fix” us to taking a more active role in our health care.

- The media uses our dissatisfaction with our bodies to sell us stuff. Keeping you convinced you need to lose weight and look different to be happy is a surefire way to sell you products. I often wonder if our obsession with our weight is actually worse for our health than our weight. For a lot of people I think it is.

Just be you.

My Weight Loss Journey

I lost a lot of weight myself. I did this by calorie counting and exercise. I am very glad I am now the smaller size version of me. I do believe that people can be fat and fit. However, I was not. I guess now I am, since technically I am overweight according to the medical community. I have come to think that body weight is such a personal thing, it really shouldn’t be up to other people how we approach it. I don’t advocate anyone doing what I did, it’s not for me to say what’s right for you. You have to figure that out yourself.

This used to be all about me, but it’s not anymore. Soon enough, over 20,000 people will be following me on Facebook. Those who have been with me for a long time have probably noticed the change. It’s coincidental with a change in my own life focus, so it worked out well for me.

I don’t post or write about weight loss anymore. I post about healthy eating. I post about loving yourself. I post about exercise. I post pictures of my cooking. I post articles about weight and health. But I don’t advise people on how to lose weight or encourage them to anymore. The way I see it, we are bombarded with that crap every single day from every avenue. I want to encourage what I see as positive for everyone whether you’re recovering from anorexia or working on losing half your body weight or you’re healthy and happy just the way you are.

Comments : 11 Comments »
Tags: Health, health and weight, healthy lifestyle, Weight, weight loss
Categories : My Lifestyle

Need a 2013 Goal? Forget “Lose Weight” – Actions Anyone Can Take for a Healthier Life

1 01 2013

Here are some ideas for simple actions a person can take to live a healthier life. When we choose to focus on our actions and habits instead of focusing on a fickle and unpredictable outcome, such as losing weight, we take back our power over our lives. Don’t be at the mercy of the scale. Focus on the habits you can control every day in your life. I’m not suggesting anyone tackle all of these at once. Perhaps choose just one and work on that until it becomes comfortable then add another. Or consider choosing one food-related, one movement-related, and one self-image related goal. Many small steps taken consistently over time add up to big results toward living a happier, healthier life.

replace sugary drinks with water or unsweetened tea
try a new vegetable once a week
include fruits or vegetables with every meal
start the day with a healthy breakfast
cook one new recipe from scratch per week
pack your lunch and bring it to work instead of going out
reduce or eliminate foods containing High Fructose Corn Syrup or artificial sweeteners
quit smoking (so much more important than your weight!)
drink less alcoholic beverages
take a walk every day, 5 days a week, or 3 days a week (start slow and build up)
look in the mirror and say something nice to yourself every day
1 day a week, choose an unexplored area near you and go for a hike (urban or nature)
get regular sleep
try a new physical activity that sounds fun to you
schedule at least 1 hour of “me” time a week and use it to do something you enjoy that relaxes you
commit to one vegetarian day a week and explore vegetable-based cooking (everyone can stand more vegetables in my book, vegan or omnivore)
keep a journal and write down what you are thinking about and feeling at times when you strongly desire to binge eat but are not physically hungry.
sit less. if you work at a desk, set a timer and get up every 20 minutes, even if it’s just to stretch. Better yet, take a walk around your office. When you’re on the phone, stand up.
when buying processed foods, choose products that contain ingredients you understand or 5 ingredients or less
commit to shopping at your local farmers market whenever possible or joining a CSA
take the stairs instead of the elevator
park as far away from the store as possible and walk
don’t drive everywhere, walk if you can
prepare a large batch of something on the weekend you can easily reheat for meals during the week
instead of delivery pizza, try making your own at home with fresh ingredients
seek out healthier version of the things you love to eat
reduce or eliminate foods containing partially hydrogenated or hydrogenated oils
sign up for an event like a 5K walk or run and train for it
replace negative thoughts about the way your body looks with positive thoughts about the things your body can do
reduce your consumption of media that only celebrates perfect airbrushed bodies (magazines, television, online, etc)
subscribe to healthy recipe blogs, newsletters, or facebook pages
if you are beginning an exercise program, keep track of the positive improvements in your performance (being able to continue longer or harder)
stop self-deprecating talk
stop talking about other people’s weight or body size
stop comparing yourself to others
donate or put away clothing that does not fit and flatter you right now
prepare vegetables and fruits ahead of time so you have healthy, easy to grab snacks ready when you want to munch something
watch less television
take a walk on your lunch break at work (perhaps with a coworker!)
if you have certain foods you find you binge eat, don’t keep those foods around your home
take a cooking class
eat 1 salad a day with dinner or lunch
eat meals off of smaller plates and bowls, then wait 15-20 minutes before deciding if you want to eat more
commit to not cleaning your plate. Even if you leave just one bite behind, you are teaching yourself you are in control of how much you eat, not the size of your plate.
when you eat something indulgent, eat it slowly and enjoy it, guilt free. Then move on.
try a video game that requires you to stand up and move
join a gym or yoga studio and commit to a certain number of workouts per week
choose a different type of ethnic food each month, and explore healthy, veggie-heavy recipes from that culture’s cuisine (you may discover a love of certain flavors and spices this way)
take up a new hobby that is outdoors or a hobby that keeps you occupied when watching television (less mindless snacking)
every day, turn on some music you love and dance when nobody is watching

Comments : 9 Comments »

Categories : Health, inspiration, My Lifestyle, Tips

Changes You Cannot See

30 12 2012

I have a before and after picture. I have quite a few of them, actually. You can see them here if you have not already. Pretty cool, eh? Many people have told me I look like a completely different person. They tell me I look younger. I am unrecognizable. 100 pounds is a lot of weight, no doubt about it. I did something many people only dream of doing, and I have the pictures to show for it.

Yes, this is a part of my story, I lost a lot of weight. I have said this before but it bears repeating, my weight is the least interesting thing about me.

As time passes, I become more and more aware of the other changes that have taken place, the ones nobody can see. These changes are so much more meaningful and profound than my smaller size that I begin to find myself resenting the obsessive focus everyone has on weight. Whether it’s my weight or their weight or some celebrity’s weight, weight is very interesting to everyone. I get it. We live in a hyper-weight-focused society. Whether it’s the so-called “obesity crisis” or game shows that reward the person who can lose the most weight the fastest, or the latest celebrity diet “success story.”

I am aware of the weight obsession even more keenly because I participate in it myself. I don’t think there has been a day I haven’t thought about my weight since I was a teenager. How sad is that? What a waste of valuable time and energy I could have spent doing things I like, or things that could benefit the world. I wish I could prevent people from suffering the same fate, especially young women. But how is it possible? How can we let go of something society deems so incredibly meaningful and important? How can we not focus on our weight when it is impossible to go a minute without hearing about it?

Once I started thinking of my body as the enemy and started the lifelong battle with my weight, it was incredibly hard to extricate myself. More dieting led to more weight gain in the long run, a predictable outcome that is never talked about. Even as we attempt to control our bodies, we become more out of control. All the while, a persistent message reaches all of us, big and small: Lose weight. Lose weight. Lose weight. Lose weight. no matter what size you are, Lose weight. I lost weight, and I still hear the call, loud and clear. It never ends, no matter what size you are.

But recently, I have felt my feelings about this shift and change. It occurred to me how ridiculous this all is. I haven’t weighed myself since October. And, miracle of miracles, I think about my weight so much less. I am freeing myself. Perhaps someday soon I will not think of it at all.

My lifestyle is very important to me. It makes me a healthier person, mentally and physically in every way. Too often I am saddened when I see the word “lifestyle” bandied about as if it were just another word for diet or just another way to lose weight. It’s not, but most people don’t seem to get it. It is the Way You Live Your Life. It is taking the time to think about your food, where it comes from, how it is prepared, and honestly attending to what your body and mind needs and wants. It’s about listening to yourself, body and mind, which are truly connected in every way. The benefits are sleeping better, feeling happier overall, having more energy, enjoying joy, increased self-esteem, a feeling of accomplishment, and the wonderful feeling of knowing you care about yourself and take care of yourself. How sad that we distill this down to the number of pounds I have lost. You cannot measure what I have gained through this change.

The fear of losing control of our weight is apparent in almost every person I’ve ever encountered who has a Before and After picture. It hangs over them like an axe, ready to drop at any moment and return them to the life of miserable fatness they so valiantly overcame. Self included.

That fear is exactly the thing that kept me from being able to not think about my weight every single day. It’s the reason I stepped on the scale every single morning, just to make sure. And every morning, I would breathe a sigh of relief that my weight had not magically ballooned back up to 287 pounds.

There is only one way to overcome that fear and most of you are not going to like it: you have to give up the idea that controlling your weight is the most important thing, or even on your list of important things. And this may mean accepting that your body’s happy natural healthy weight is not as low as you might like it to be. I know this will not be something most people are ready or able to do. The importance of our weight is so ingrained in us, it is second nature.

It is what I decided to do though. I will continue to live my life with the healthy habits I have developed that led to my weight loss. I will continue to exercise because it brings me so many benefits. I will continue to eat my plant based mostly whole foods diet that brings me so many benefits. What I will no longer do is spend another second worrying about my weight.

I started to have these thoughts and feelings several months ago, and a strange thing happened when I put the scale away. All the sudden I stopped cleaning my plate. I found myself eating more slowly. Sometimes I found myself eating more than I would have previously, and sometimes less. My fullness signal seemed to magically appear as soon as I decided I would simply listen to myself and eat as honestly as possible according to my wants and needs without any thoughts about how it might affect my all-important weight.

Since I have not gotten on the scale lately, I can’t tell you if I have gained, lost, or stayed the same, but I would guess I have stayed the same. My clothes fit and I like the way I look. I have accepted my body’s natural shape, size and weight and it is glorious. But I do not now and never will fit society’s ideal. It was imperative to give that up to make peace with my unique and womanly body.

I am grateful for my journey through life, including my struggles with my weight. I am grateful for my weight loss. I was woefully out of shape and eating terribly unhealthy foods in quantities far beyond my body’s needs. I never developed a healthy relationship with food or moving my body. Nobody ever taught me that, because they were always too busy worrying about my weight. The time I spent counting calories and monitoring my weight was a learning experience for me and I am glad I did it. I’m not sure I would recommend it to others. Instead, I would recommend beginning to develop your relationship with food, focusing on eating nutritious foods and moving your body in ways that bring you joy. But in the end, I know each person must follow their own heart and path and I probably had to go through my own path to get to where I am now.

I have deleted all calorie counting apps from my phone and bookmarks.
I put the scale away, out of sight.
I removed all clothing from my closet that do not fit me perfectly and make me feel comfortable and beautiful right now.
I don’t look at the calorie count on the treadmill or elliptical anymore, I focus on how I feel.
I don’t think about calories at all. I focus on what I really want and how much.
I eat when I feel hungry, not when external signals say so. Unless I am celebrating in a social situation, in which case I eat whatever I like, which turns out to be very moderate and reasonable effortlessly.
I deleted all the weight, eating, and food-related books from my iPad and bought some fiction.
I look at myself every morning in the mirror and I say “thank you” to my body.
I accept and embrace my body’s unique attributes, known by some as “flaws”.
I am a beautiful and good person.
I am much more than my weight.
I have made peace. ☮

Comments : 14 Comments »
Tags: inner changes, lifestyle, scale, Weight, weight loss, weight obsession
Categories : My Lifestyle, Weight

Weight and Weight Loss: I’m Over It

8 12 2012

I don’t weigh myself anymore. It’s been about a month since I did. This may come to a surprise to people who have been following me and know I used to be a daily weigher.

Those who really know me should not be surprised though, because if there’s one thing I will always continue to embrace, it’s change. I know that in order to continue to grow, I will sometimes change my mind.

So what happened? A couple of things. The first thing was my injury the day after Labor Day, when I fell and suffered a concussion. My weight all the sudden meant less to me. It seemed so silly and ridiculous the amount of time I spent ensuring I always stayed in the same range after losing 120 pounds 2 years ago. Every day, weighing myself, adjusting what I ate, adjusting what exercise I did… it seemed reasonable at the time. It doesn’t now. When I was really feeling shitty from the concussion, I felt like it was clear which things were important and which weren’t. Spending a lot of time thinking about my weight lost importance, it went into the same category as stressing out about my job. Not that it’s simple stop thinking about those things, but I’ve been putting in the effort not to be absorbed by things that don’t improve my daily happiness.

I’ve relaxed significantly. The other thing that I’m dealing with is my chronic back pain which has been constant and frankly getting worse for the last year. I’ve de-intensified my exercise for this reason. I’ve been listening to my body, and my physical therapist. I’ve stopped lifting heavy weights altogether. I’ve stopped running. I’ve stopped doing any sort of impactful exercise. I’ve started doing certain yoga poses specifically for my back. I’ve started doing the gentle abdominal exercises prescribed to me. I get my heartrate up by uphill walking, elliptical trainer, or recumbent biking.

I’ve also started changing my daily habits to eliminate long periods of sitting. I just received a standing desk for my office at work and I’m already sitting less than 4 hours a day at work which is a huge improvement over sitting over 8 hours or more. I plan to gradually reduce sitting time as much as I can.

I feel really good about my eating habits. I haven’t changed what I’ve been eating, though I’ve become more aware of eating what I really want to eat and spending less time thinking about whether I “should” eat it. I’ve found that I often want a hot breakfast with eggs, something I used to have very infrequently. I’ve found that for lunch, I generally want soup or chili. I’ve found that for dinner, I tend to prefer a huge pile of vegetables with some sort of grain or pasta.

But I’ve also found that sometimes, I don’t need to cook everything from scratch. At least once a week, I’ve been having a frozen Amy’s meal (love them!). Sometimes I stop at Whole Foods and make myself a big salad for lunch or get breakfast from their hot foods case. I sometimes have Chipotle for dinner. Starbucks has this veggie artisan sandwich I just love.

I had gotten so adverse to foods I didn’t cook myself, that I was foregoing these things, that I do actually really like! Yes, I can make decently good pre-made food choices. I don’t need to be so stringent. I still cook most of what I eat myself, but I’m just feeling less strict about it and this has released so much stress from my life that I didn’t really realize was building up.

And finally, the tipping event, I started reading the book Health at Every Size. I plan to review it when I finish it, but the minute I started reading it, I recognized something in myself that I immediately knew had to stop: spending one more second thinking about my weight. Done. Over it. That’s that.

And here’s the real kicker, something I never realized until I started to read this book. Say what I would about focusing on health instead of weight, I was not entirely doing that myself.

I am doing it now. Part of letting go was coming to a place of acceptance that I might gain some weight. That’s what stopped me from getting off the scale for so long: fear of gaining weight. In fact, when I stopped weighing myself last April for a month, I did gain weight.

And I’ve been struggling for awhile about this, but not wanting to write about it because I wanted to let what was taking place mentally with me happen naturally and not be influenced by the opinions of others. I have been vacillating between thinking of trying to lose the bit of weight I re-gained and embracing it. Every once in awhile I’d fire up the old MyFitnessPal app and start thinking about counting calories… and it just didn’t happen.

I realized something when I got that concussion. Being comfortable with my eating and exercise habits as they are now, listening to what my body needs, focusing on the medical issues I have, these things are more important to me than what I weigh. The way I know to lose weight, calorie counting, means giving up something that’s more important to me: my very healthy relationship with food! I have never had such a reasonable, moderate, and satisfying relationship with food. To put it bluntly, I don’t want to fuck with a good thing.

In making this decision, I feel so powerful because I am ignoring all the false messaging that we all must constantly obsess about our weight. Note, this does not mean I no longer work out and I am going to eat a bunch of fast food and gain 100 pounds again. I get so tired fo hearing that from people: that if you aren’t focused on your weight, the only other option is cheesy nachos, pizza, cake, chips, and television. That’s just a false choice, a red herring. I love my healthy lifestyle! Exercise is vital! Eating real whole foods most of the time is practically magic in the way it makes you feel. Don’t worry, I’m not headed to the drivethru.

Our society is so damned overly-obsessed with our weight, losing weight, gaining weight, celebrity’s weight, baby weight, and being on a diet to the exclusion of everything else. I don’t want to be a part of that. I definitely love that I can inspire people because I lost a lot of weight, but I’m hoping that instead of focusing on that aspect, I can get people to see that the most profound changes I have made over this journey are much deeper and more important: my actions, my habits, my internal dialogue, my self-esteem, my self-respect, my commitment to my own physical and mental health, taking care of my nutritional needs, and regularly moving my body. Without these things, weight loss would be meaningless.

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Categories : Health

This is Not a Diet

Why I Eat Pasta

Getting My Exercise Groove Back

Book: Health at Every Size by Linda Bacon

Health and Weight

Need a 2013 Goal? Forget “Lose Weight” – Actions Anyone Can Take for a Healthier Life

Changes You Cannot See

Weight and Weight Loss: I’m Over It

This is Not a Diet it’s Your Life

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