Have you ever noticed that most short girls want to be tall and most tall girls want to be short? Have you noticed that women with small breasts long for enhancement and women with large breasts long for reduction?
They try to sell us the idea that each woman can look like ANY woman. We can ALL be tall and skinny with big boobs and perfectly curvy bubble butts, tan flawless skin, white teeth and voluminous glowing hair.
Only, we can’t all be that woman.
I think men are a lot more accepting of the idea of variety among women than women are themselves. I have had many male friends in my life who have been very open about what they preferred when it came to a woman’s physical appearance. Of course there were those guys who ONLY liked skinny petite girls. I must admit, I find that a tad creepy, but to each his own. Most of the guys I have know have openly admired a surprising range of female figures. One guy told me how much he was turned on by “muffin top.” One liked shorties. One liked women who look like superheroes. Some like perky ones and some like enormous ones. Most like breasts of all shapes and sizes. The bottom line is that if you’re female, there’s a good chance there’s a guy out there who’s very interested in seeing what you look like naked.
Personally, I’ve been every weight a woman can be and I’ve never had a shortage of dates!
Why do we want to be what we are not? And where is the line we will not cross in pursuit of our perceived ideals?
I find it insane and frightening that plastic surgery not only exists, but that it is a commonly accepted practice. It just baffles my mind. My line is a lot more conservative than some people’s, I suppose. I would never cut, maim, vacuum or have foreign objects surgically inserted into my body. One: it never looks real. It always looks plastic and alien and therefore gross. Two: Barring a disfiguring accident or birth defect, I see no reason to take such drastic measures in the attempt to make myself look different. Why? There is more than one type of beauty and small breasts are just as beautiful as large ones.
What’s so bad about variety? Why can’t we celebrate short women with big butts and tall women with small chests and everything in between?
Something that really helped me accept myself was seeing pictures of Crystal Renn. She has my body type! I was so excited when I saw her. Not that I’m a model or anything. She’s simply stunning in ways I am not. But just to see a woman in clothes and think to myself “That’s what I would look like in that outfit” felt so freeing! I’m not saying models shouldn’t be representatives of the most beautiful among us, but there are so many ways to be beautiful. It is immensely helpful to look at an image of a beautiful woman who has a body like mine.
I have to show some love to Glamour magazine for taking some steps in the right direction. After their pictures of Lizzi Miller were such a hit, they listened to their readers and started including more body types in the magazine. It is the only fashion magazine I will even consider purchasing. They have an article this month about swimsuits to flatter different figures, but instead of showing 3 figure types that all look pretty much the same, they actually have a very representative spread of many types of women! I was very happy to see this.
I’m not the praying type, but I think the answer to self acceptance, and many other aspects of life, is in the serenity prayer.
Accept the things you cannot change: I would go so far as to suggest you love the things you cannot change. If you can love being tall instead of wishing you were petite, maybe you can see yourself in a better light.
Change the things you can: If you are overweight and/or out of shape, you can change it. You can lose weight with simple moderate diet and regular exercise. Wear clothes that highlight the best parts of your figure and minimize the parts you least appreciate.
Know the difference: It is by far the hardest part. Just be honest with yourself. You know how restrictive is too restrictive. Try not to judge yourself too harshly against images you see in the media.